starz

Peter meets a lady. He is 23 and she is 38. Their eyes zap together and they couldn’t let go of each other. Is it purely a physical attraction that leads to nothing more than what is inside the pants or something mysterious is working?

Doreen meets a man. She is 27 and he is 40. There is instant bonding. Trust me that many will conclude she is eyeing for the money if he is rich and he is waiting for the body if she is drop dead gorgeous. Can there not be true love?

Love is difficult to define. Perhaps it is not even meant to be defined. It is an overpowering emotion that makes life real. Why is it that one needs to define love?

Because we firstly need to explain to family and friends the reason we love a particular person. Then the person we love demands to know why we love. And finally we need to psychologically appease ourselves by converting feelings into words. Words with prescribed meanings just like the ones I am using to type this essay. These words give to us the security of something we know, a familiar ground to tread on.

Can words truly elucidate what I feel and can you sincerely understand what I feel through many coatings of conditioned words? Can you read without judging? Can I write without judging?

We have a neat filing system in our minds. Who we love and who we only like. The line is distinctively drawn for one cause; to protect ourselves.

The conditions set us into tin soldiers. Why, how, which, who and what we love is pre-determined by words; words that contain the mandate of the society and society teaches us the right way to behave.

How else do we know the way to rationalize our feelings? How to calm raving emotions?

Someone told me once, “You don’t love me. You only love an image of me. If you get to know me and see who I am, you probably won’t love me as much.”

I tell you that it is not a fact. Nothing is immutable. Everything changes constantly. You can’t quantify love or bottle it up in a container. To love you have to give and must not be afraid to be hurt. You have to move on.

Have you ever held someone in your arms and feel love?