Friday, November 03, 2006

grace


We very often claim to know a person based on memories. You know, what this person did or didn't do, what was said and what were their reactions in the past. The past sets precedence for the future. These factors formulate for us the characteristics of a person. And if we see a person doing the same thing again and again, it is a norm for us to conclude that he or she will do it forever. It becomes a habit. Habits are acceptable conditioned behaviours. This draws out the dutiful teeth brushing ventures in the morning, at least. And so it becomes a repetitive act of moving a brush up and down in our mouth. We do it because we have been doing it for eons.
But then, can we turn brushing our teeth to not become a habit? Ah, please don't get the idea of not brushing every day but at random. Remember that what becomes stale is not the act itself but the intention. An act becomes boring because we are no longer interested. It is the mind, our thinking that drags boredom into the picture.
Just like in relationships, we get tired of routines because if yesterday was bad, we hope for tomorrow to be better. Should yesterday be better, then tomorrow must be betterER and so on. But how come the person I love is still the same piece of shit? What is wrong with wanting a good, excellent and spectacular future? I don't think it is wrong and I don't think it is right either. If we do stop to ponder, we glaringly notice that TODAY is the future that we hoped for yesterday. Every second becomes the past and future is the next breath we take.
I am not propounding that we should give up on inventing and improving lives. We should engage in such activites even more. But if the future is a fight, then we will compete with each other to secure the betteREST outcomes. On the other hand, if we accept and are aware that the future is only a concept declared by the mind, we will not fight, compete, destroy and control one another. There is nothing to fear. We realise that we create our future in our minds. The focus will then shift from competition to complimenting one another; working together. Because then we also are aware that external factors are excuses used to excert authority over those referred to as weak or wrong.
The next time you determine the character of a person based on events of the past - pause - observe with a fresh mind for surprises that will tear you away from habits.

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

never say never

I am not giving up on you.

Monday, October 30, 2006

open

I am a passionate, caring, loving and powerful woman.
I am honest and trustworthy.

Saturday, October 28, 2006

run the mile

What stands in between a person and her dreams? I think it should be limiting beliefs, the most cruel opinion is I can't do it. Maybe things are not as bad as they are but waiting can rip every cel from my body.

I met a very experienced film producer today. She offered me a chance to shine. It is a fantastic avenue to get real and be involved in an internationally recognised project. It takes more than commitment and confidence. It requires serious dedication. I don't know what I have to contribute but it would mean everything. I am on the team.
Next, someone is trying to write me about a long dead and gone issue, technically. But it is making me feel guilty. I feel very uncomfortable and I ask why? Waiting kills...

november

I am very happy that the month of November is filled with work and excitement. I can't wait for things to happen; film projects, Tarot promotions and spiritual experiences. 2006 is almost ending and I have discovered much more about myself through the various trainings that I attended. I am aware of my bad vibes and how I can create a lot of space for good and positive vibrations to enter.
However, I have to admit that I do miss the days when Sally and Loletta were in KL. Love you two ladies soooooooo much.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

love is a wonderfully crazy thing


It is good to admire beauty, but it is neither good nor practical to want to take beauty home, put it on a shelf, and say, "You stay right there." When we see something beautiful, we may begin to want it for ourselves. It may be a dramatic house, it may be a lovely flower, it may be a graceful dancer - we just want it. If this wanting becomes a compulsion, it is likely we will lose what we want so much.

Jealousy comes into a relationship when we try to possess someone for ourselves. It is a very difficult secret to discover: that when we do not want to possess another person selfishly, when we do not make demand after demand, the relationship will grow and last. And it is something we have to learn the hard, hard way. This is the secret of all relationships, not only between husband and wife, boyfriend and girlfriend, but between friend and friend, parents and children. Instead of trying to exact and demand, just give, and give more, and give still more. This is the way to earn love and respect.

E.E.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

owtfgfia

Sally & Loletta
the most adorable and lovable women in the world
...having a good time...

Saturday, October 21, 2006

for everyone who can't freely love

There will never be a time when I can love you
That day is brightly bleak
Like the dark ways my love grows
Each minute you step further
I am closer to the truth
I will never see you again.

I don't love you because you are beautiful
I don't love you because you are fair
For if I know why I love you
The moon gently flies to the wolf
then the lonesome howling stops -
to a call for an answer home.

I love you because I do and not because I should
In these lines I confess I am a fool
To give my heart to a smile
But not when Romeo kisses Juliet
I don't play his part -
You are not a romance that hangs on a kite.

I love you because you are you
I can't love you because I am me
If I am you and you are me; I wonder -
Would you love me?
Or is this love just to you
Since I am on the other team.

I don't know where I will be
A million years from now
An atomic-burger digested by cosmic storm
Your being glues to my core
The final dance destroys not
Your kindess and trust, my love.


Wednesday, October 18, 2006

special olympics

A few years ago at the Seattle Special Olympics, nine contestants, all physically or mentally disabled, assembled at the starting line for the 100 yard dash.
At the gun, they all started out, not exactly in a dash, but with a relish to run the race to the finish and win. All, that is, except one boy who stumbled onthe asphalt, tumbled over a couple of times and began to cry. The other eight heard the boy. They slowed down and looked back. They all turned around and went back. Every one of them.
One girl with Down's Syndrome bent down and kissed himand said, "This will make it better." All nine linked arms and walked across the finish line together.
Everyone in the stadium stood, and the cheering went on for several minutes. People who were there are still telling the story. Why? Because deep down we know one thing.
What matters most in this life is more than winning for ourselves. What truly matters in this life is helping others win, even if it means slowing down and changing our course.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

metta

May there be peace, trust and compassion on earth.
I send you love and light.

bravo


Detachment from likes and dislikes, habits and opinions, is not a sign of weakness. It is an enormously strong and positive quality. Nor does freedom from likes and dislikes mean that life is insipid for us, but rather that we are not driven compulsively by rigid ways of thinking. Even if we don't get what we want - or if we do get what we don't want - we can still function cheerfully and efficiently.

Detachment from habits does not mean that we have no habits. Good habits can be very useful to cultivate in life. But we should be able to change our habits gracefully, or drop them altogether when necessary, especially if we learn that they are harmful to us or are not exactly endearing us to those around us. If we are used to a cup of coffee every morning with our breakfast and one morning we discover that we are out of coffee, we don't say, "I can't function without my coffee," and go back to bed. We should be able to say cheerfully, "I'll have tea instead - or soy milk."
E.E.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

one step at a time

I have a dream and it is about something not necessary. It is what I always label to be an external fulfilment. But as long as I live in this world, so must I continue to playing its game. My desires, goals, feelings and negative dispositions are the concepts that the mind conjure. It is my only task to seperate truth from falsity.

I don't feel that I am coerced in to choosing between what is right and wrong. Because once I am debating in the realm of right and wrong, any decision I make is out of confusion and delusion. Then how can the question of what is right and wrong be a right question to ask?

Whenever a feeling operates from the ego or image, it is also operating from selfishness. Then I am taking from the person I declare to love. And that whoever comes near to the person I love, I feel threatened and try to defend my position. Whenever I work from the ego, each project is for a self-gratifying purpose. Then I only do things that benefit me. What is in it for me? Do I look good? Will I feel good?
Maybe no questions should be asked at all. Whatever feelings, emotions and actions that arise; they are synchronised incidents. It is what it is.
What I resist persists.

Friday, October 13, 2006

amore

Loletta Chu - Miss Hong Kong 1977

She walks in grace and charm.
She walks in strength and compassion.
What a beauty! What a woman!
An Interesting excerpt:
Lewi says:
the loletta pix looks modern, does not look like something taken in the 70's. she is beautiful.

Wendy - WenWenG5 says:
Gosh...it is not taken in the 70's, dear. Look at the date on the top right corner, it states 2005 in the month of December!!!!

Lewi says:
holy golly! how old is loletta now? was she 5 when she won Ms HK?

Wendy - WenWenG5 says:
47

Lewi says:
can't be true. i don't believ you.

tomb



I can't recall as to when did my good friend recommend Studs Terkel's works to me; maybe about a month ago. I only took time to look for his book yesterday. The theme of this book is "death". It is highly provocative since many will avoid this indelible certainty like a plague. However Terkel interviewed a variety of people about this issue and they eleborated on it with ease. From fire fighters to actors, no one ran away from the eyes of death.

Terkel did not write about "death" from the religious nor the secular point of view. He went knocking from door to door and asked people about it. After all, Terkel is a well known and respected American oral historian.

A hilarious event happened when purchasing the book. I went to a particular bookshop and conducted a search on one of its computers for this title. When the results came back, the book was listed under the "DEATH" category. I was shocked and within seconds burst out laughing. I seriously have not seen a "DEATH" category anywhere in the bookshop.

So, I gracefully skipped over to the information counter and inquired on this issue. Even the sales assistant couldn't help but to smile bashfully at me. After going through the computer, he said, "Come miss, I will show you where "DEATH" is."

I replied, "Death oh Death! I embrace thee with love!"

shout

The only person who knows me is me. It is a grave mistake to hope for others to relate to me because I find until today that no one is listening to each other. Even I don't.

Happy Friday the 13th! Have fun.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

misunderstood

Maybe it is a fetish or to be honest, I enjoy the attention. I always liked to be different. In other words, I like to be a nerd, someone who is alienated because I am not a photocopy of everyone else.

But I would like to share with you that everyone is a nerd. We are all different. We can like the same thing, for example we enjoy a game of tennis. We go fishing together. It is impossible to be completely alike. We can on the surface pretend to be a flock of sheep wearing A&F t-shirts, Versace jeans and Nike shoes. However, I can tell you that deep down you just want to scream out and say "Hei! Look at me! I am not like them. I am unique! Don't mistake me for them."

So before we tease poor Mr and Ms Wallpaper, take a look in the mirror and see a dumb-nerd smiling back.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

5 wood

Happy Birthday, Forest (the Prince among the 3 Golden Flowers - not the orange guy at the back)
From fan to friend
Singing hand-in-hand
Travelling across the land
Happy until the end.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

oink

MY NEW CHU-PIG FAMILY
Pigs are fantastically cute, for obvious reasons.

Saturday, October 07, 2006

connections

I believe it was Danielle Steel who wrote in her magnificient book, "The Gift" that some people are meant to stay forever in our lives while some are there for just one moment in time. I can't remember the exact words. Whatever the time period, these beautiful folks have touched my life with their sincerity, love, kindness, HONESTY and compassion. I am thankful that you are all in my life whether for just 6 days or 15 years. You have impressed upon me the truth of sharing, unity and caring. I know that some of you may have been rude to me and that I have hurt you too. Irrespective of the consequences, I have faith in the core of your goodness; that behind the image of being a tough, strong and demanding person lies a giving, loving and gentle soul. I treasure each second that I spend with you and each second is eternity.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

you're beautiful


I am not a presentable singer and I am no where near being one. But I always imagine singing for my idol, Sally Yeh. Her voice is of course flawless and extremely mesmerising. Mine pales in comparison to hers. However, I thought it would be special if I could sing for her after listening to her voice for 15 years. Believe it or not, I did. It was on her birthday that we went to the karaoke. Her badminton-friends are warm, friendly and fun. They insisted that the fans must sing. So, I gathered-up my courage and sang my heart out. I sang "Wah Lai Yuen" and "Lan Hua Cao"; both of which are songs by Sally. But the best song that I sang that night was "You're Beautiful" by James Blunt. I love it!



the birthday bash!!!

smashin'

The 13th World Chinese Badminton Championship was held in Puchong, Malaysia from September 29th - October 1st. Being an august event, the ambassador of the International Badminton Federation, Sally Yeh was invited to grace the occasion. It is unfortunate that she sprained her calf muscle a week ago. Therefore, she could not take part in the game. Her best friend, Loletta Chu who was former Miss Hong Kong participated with the rest of the Hong Kong team. Although she didn't win, she surely put up a tough fight against one of China's top female player, Chen Ping; taking into account that Loletta is not a professional player while Chen is.

I must add that the venue, Michael's Badminton Academy is not a fantastic choice to hold such competitions because it is very stuffy in there - extremely poor ventilation and bad sanitation.


Birthday Girl SALLY!

Fans of Sally are lucky that she spent her birthday in Malaysia. So, there I was having a good time at two birthday parties with Sally. Isn't Sally adorable?

An autographed t-shirt from Sally.

The shopping group - Sally, Loletta, Jessica, Denise and me went shopping at Mid Valley and KLCC for one whole day! Sally and Loletta are great shoppers and they really mean business when they shop! But still I had so much of fun that day.

G5 - Loletta's bodyguard

Thrash those damn magazine reports and Hong Kong paparazzi who chased after Loletta. I don't understand why must the media create untrue stories to increase sales of their publications. I personally kicked some arse when she was harassed by the media. Being followed and questioned by the paparazzi is irritating and dangerous, I know how it feels now. Loletta is too decent and nice to be treated this way.